Prof. Dr. Kemal Arıkan
Psikiyatrist

An Angry Man

He spent his childhood years on the third floor of an old, wooden building. There were many cats in the house… It took him years to understand that the elders of the house petted them with a great attention to make them catch the mice. However, while he was a tiny but a bighearted boy during those years, he believed that each one of them was a playmate. Until one of the orange tabbies mercilessly scratched his hand… After that day, the love was not pure anymore. It was tainted with fear.

He was forcefully brought to the doctor by his parents. His left wrist was ruptured and encased in plaster. The punch he landed on the wall was just a small part of the density of his anger. The relentless feelings he had for his father dated back to many years ago. All three were in the examination room. But it was impossible to collect information from the man who was in his thirties. His eyes were spreading fire. He didn’t provide any useful information about his health, or he just couldn’t. He was constantly swearing at his father. Almost with bubbles coming out from his mouth… Both parents literally cowered and listened to him. Mother was crying in silence.

It didn’t seem possible at all. The doctor put all security rules aside and took both parents out. During all that brawl and commotion, he seemed to have a sight of the big heart the patient brought from his childhood.

Once the parents went out to leave him alone with the physician, he suddenly couldn’t know what to say. He was confused. The trust put in him made him cry sobbingly. He cried and cried for a long time. The doctor, however, waited and waited without taking his eyes off him.

“This is what that goddamn man turned me into!” he said, mumbling. His mouth was completely dry. The physician asked the secretary for a glass of water. At the moment, everything was for the young man. And the man was feeling it.

“The son of a b**ch’s eyes shine with joy while listening to me. As if he takes pleasure in this miserable state I’m facing…” he continued. There was no need for the physician to ask. He started to tell about his childhood and adolescence traumas one by one.

His father was a religion teacher. He initially scolded, humiliated and beat up his own son to set an example for other children. At the smallest of reactions, the kid found himself being dangled from the patio on the top floor of the three-floored building. From the cold expression he had when telling the story, it was apparent that he did not even want to remember the horror he experienced at that moment.

The years passed by with the discipline of his father. Now, it was the young man’s turn. Nowadays, he was busy with disciplining his father!

The anger he felt for him and others was so intense that the doctor thought what he could become if there was no limitless tolerance and if the young man did not need it limitlessly.

The patient’s story came to an end in paranoia. The meaningless looks in the eyes of his father became sarcastic. The father even intervened in his dreams from time to time. He even inspected what the young man thought.

In short, his feelings were complicated, he was extraordinarily angry and had morbid suspicions.

The mother was silent and weak. The doctor thought there wasn’t anything the patient could lean on. There wasn’t any social support at all.

This judgment disappeared when he let the parents in. With a shaking tone, the mother said “We have another son younger than him. We are afraid that he can be infected, too.”
She said “To top it all, his big brother is petting cats at home. His younger brother is very scared of cats…What do you suggest we do, doctor?”. With a low whisper.

The patient and the doctor were astonished. The patient’s anger seemed to have infected the doctor as well. Being unable to find any word, he suddenly realized that there was something that made him hold on to the life. A thing he carried to this date from his past. A cat. Cats!

He didn’t have any other things in this damn world.

And finally, a way to swallow the anger must be found!

Yorum yapın

Bu bölümde sadece okuduğunuz yazı ile ilgili yorumlarınızı iletin.